(I’m writing this post, just putting it out there into cyberspace, knowing that most of the people who will be at the wedding tomorrow, probably won’t be checking in past my blog before then. Definitely nobody from my house will be reading this, because our internet’s down.)
So, how am I? Well, as you all know, tomorrow is my baby sister’s wedding and I have such mixed feelings about the day. Firstly because she is my baby sister. I was 8 when she was born and feel (in some ways) more like a mother then her sister. I can remember everything about her from the day she was born and I have always adored her. I am totally excited for her and Gareth, I think they’re going to have an amazing day and it’s a brilliant send-off into their future as husband and wife. They are so perfectly suited to one another, so in synch, I just know tomorrow is going to be the happiest of happy days for them. What a way to start such a special journey!!
The flip side (the selfish one) of this is the simple fact that I don’t like weddings. I have always found them extremely emotional, even when I had Jacques around to hold my hand. Once you’ve been married, you can’t possibly sit through a ceremony, or speeches, or first dance, or cutting cakes, etc, without remembering your own wedding day. Plus, it feels totally wrong to have to go back up there to try catch the bouquet (in my mind; what a awful tradition!). So, as I watch Rosie getting ready tomorrow, I will be re-living every moment of the happy day that I married Jacques, remembering the excitement and nervousness that carried me through the day, which makes me really sad that he won’t be with me tomorrow. It’s just all so very wrong.
On the up side though, Jake is going to be the ring bearer and has the cutest suit in the world to wear (I mustn’t forget to pick it up later). He’s going to look so darned gorgeous in his jacket and tie and I can’t wait to walk down the aisle holding his hand. I can already feel my heart swelling with pride at just the thought. He’s a strong boy, he doesn’t even realize that he’ll actually be carrying me all the way. All day…
Love (and lots of prayers/karmic thoughts)
Sue x
6 comments:
Wishing you all a beautiful wedding day tomorrow. Thoughts will be especially with you, Susan. You can be extremely proud of Jake. He is a wonderful son and will always be there for you. Looking forward to seeing lots of wedding photos.
Love Colleen
Thanks for the wishes, I'm sure it'll all be fine, I just get stressed out thinking about it. The build up's always the worst...
Sue x
Hope it all went well! Will you be posting wedding pics? (I love looking at wedding dresses)
Beautifully written.
You captured that wrenching pull of conflicting emotions. (And it is "just all so very wrong" to not have Jacques by your side.)
Then in the end, as always, the mother lioness in you rises up and focuses on Jake.
I hope the day went as planned and that you and Jake created a whole new set of lovely memories together...
- Lee
Congratulations :) M waiting for the pics on facebook.
I feel very much the same. My best friend's wedding is approaching, 21st of dis month. We've been together since we were 3 and it'll be wonderful to see her as a bride...I'm so excited bout it. bt den like u said.. weddings take me bk to a day which meant so much to me..my day.. and ironically...I'm trying everyday now to get over that phase of my life..
Anyways, my best wishes to your baby sis :)
Thanks for the comments and support. The day went off beautifully and I managed to hold it together OK. I'm glad it's done though.
Sue X
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