Tis the season...

 Jake recently went on a toy run with his Grandpa Hubie.  Grandpa has a Gold wing that he had modified into a tricycle a while back.  He's had surgery on his spine and getting on and off a motorbike was just getting too difficult.  The trike gives him his freedom to ride in comfort, without the inconvenience of hopping on and off.  This year, he asked Jake to join him on the toy run, which was loads of fun.  Obviously I could only take pictures of them leaving the house, but it was a special morning for both of them...

 Jake's a nervous guy by nature and has always been nervous to go on the bike, but I think he really enjoyed the toy run...

 And off they go!  The Gold wing's like a car...

 We are all starting to get a little into the festive spirit.  There's no doubt that it's been tough this year, but we are hoping to make it a happy occasion, especially for the kiddies..

 Jo came through with her kiddies on Sunday morning and Rosie popped in with Rylee, so we decided it would be fun to have the whole family (minus husbands) there to put up the tree.  We got the actual tree up before they arrived...

 Jake is as tall as my dad now...

 And he's got a very deep voice and super hairy legs, but he still acts like a clown...

 All the boys working together to make our tree beautiful - it's so full of memories...

 Dad adding some touches...

   Rylee was super excited to help, especially with all his cousins there...

 While all the boys were busy decorating the tree, Princess Stinky was standing in the corner crying because she got purple slime in her hair.  Poor girl had a planter's wart burnt off the side of her foot and it's formed a huge blood blister, that's about the size and colour of a black fruit pastille...

 Precious Corky...

 Dad always puts the fairy on top of the tree and she's always the last decoration to go on.  She's a total drunken fairy (fitting for our house) - her head is separate from her body and we always have to look for both parts...

  And she's up and ready to watch over us all this festive season...

 A hug for the tree...

It's been a tough year for us as a family.  My dad's health hasn't been great. The short version is that he needs to have both his legs amputated, mid-calf.  He has no circulation below his ankles.  He's already had a toe removed, but it just isn't healing.  It's a terrifying thought for all of us, Dad most of all and we have more questions than answers.  Dad's seeing the surgeon on Friday and we'll hopefully get some more answers to our many questions then.  At the moment, it's all very much up in the air and they haven't even set a date for the surgery yet.  News like this puts your mind in a spin and we are all constantly thinking about how this is going to impact life for all of us.  We are hopeful that this will only happen in 2019.  For now, we are all working hard at keeping spirits up and enjoying the holidays with the kids and Dad.  Thankfully, we are strong as a family and we have a ridiculously childish way of finding stupid things to laugh about.

Sending love,

Sue XXX

Only parenting...

There are so many rewards in being a parent.  Watching a baby grow into an independent being and loving that being so unconditionally, is the greatest gift on earth.  Helping them figure out life, is so rewarding in so many ways.

Parenting has many challenges for any couple.  Financially it's a strain to extend your family.  To go from two, to three of four people is huge jump and the changes to your financial priorities happens fast.  We all tend to put our kids first.  Their education should always be our priority.  They need to have clothes to wear and a roof over their head.  But the financial stretch doesn't come even close to the emotional stretch.  I didn't know that my heart had so much room in it, until I looked into Jake's blue eyes that very first time.  There's  nothing that can prepare you for that rush of emotion. And it continues throughout their lives.  Each time they reach a milestone or achieve (sometimes overachieve), your heart swells a little more.

There's a lot to be said for sharing this feeling with your partner.  Granted, I only had a few moments to treasure Jake with Jacques, but we did.  Jacques loved his son so much and was so proud of his boy.  He loved walking through the shops with his tiny bundle in his arms and the attention it brought him.  Sadly, many kids grow up in broken homes, with parents who fight and hurt and hate.  I'd rather be a single parent than put my child through that kind of emotional trauma.

Single parenting is tough.  It's can't be easy sharing holidays or sending your little tots away for weekends.  It would break my heart and I am selfishly so glad that I have Jake all to myself.  Don't get me wrong, I'd rather be a whole, happy family, but I can't have that, so I'm grateful that I get to have every Christmas and birthday and everything with Jake.  Single parenting brings fighting over maintenance and time, but it also brings two grown ups that generally have their kids best interest at heart.  I don't have that.  There's a difference between single parenting and only parenting.  Only parenting means nobody to confer with over your child's issues.  Nobody to back you up in an argument.  Nobody to discipline an unruly teen.  It means no second income.  Shopping for Christmas presents on your own (yes, I know many married women do this too, but that's a choice).  Nobody to bounce ideas off.  Nobody to plan holidays with.  It's really all up to one person to do everything and to make all the decisions, financial, well-being and emotional.  No back up guy.

So when people ask me why I live with my parents, I have two answers.  1st, why wouldn't I?  We get on so well and it's really so great to have backup.  My mom is incredible and has helped me so much with raising Jake.  They have an unbelievable bond and that's something money can't buy.  I've always said that Jake just wants time.  We have enough space in our old family home and it works well for us.  It might change with time, but for now, we're very happy with where we are.  Plus, there are people to talk to when my teenager goes into hiding.  2nd, it makes financial sense.  We are able to rent out our home and use the extra income to cover the cost of living.  And let's face it - life has gotten crazy expensive this year!

So, only parenting vs single parenting is a whole different ball game.  They both come with challenges and rewards.  I guess you just take what you've got and get on with it as best you can.  And enjoy the ride!

Love,

Sue xxx

We took a trip and fell in love...

The Karoo is a crazy, dry, desolate semi-arid region, covering part of the interior of South Africa.  The Karoo National Park falls about 500km outside of Cape Town, just before the little country dorpie (town) of Beaufort West.  Jake was invited to attend a camp there during his September school holidays with the Cape Town Junior Rangers group that he is a member of.  And whoo-hoo, parents were included, so I got to tag along and join in the fun.  The picture above was taken half way up a little mountain that we hiked on our first morning.  The little cottages below are the ones that you stay in if you visit the park.  We stayed at an education center some way away from these.  The huts above cost just under R1,400.00 a night for 2 people, including breakfast - not bad at all.

A beautiful fever tree at our campsite in the fading sunlight...

 The view from our hut.  The fence is electrified, as the park has lions...

 When you take the time to explore the Karoo on foot, it's amazing the beauty that you find.  These plants are literally growing out of the dry earth and rocks...

There's so much beauty when you stop and look closely...

Our group learning along the way.  After a restless night due to the heat, it was really COLD the next morning for our hike...

The barren landscape...

The kids found a tortie.  He was hiding from the wind and cold in a small bush...

Checking to see whether this giant was in fact a boy or a girl.  The indent in it's belly confirms that it is indeed a he...

Onwards and upwards...

And up some more.  There's Jake...

Some of the scenery near the top of our little hike...

 Finally at the top, the wind was howling and I was terrified that one of the kids were going to get blown off the mountain into the nothingness below.  We had a good giggle at Jake's crazy hair dance though...

And more brightly coloured plants...

The views from the top were breathtaking...

Oh gosh, are you sick of the plant pics?  These plants are so small and so perfect.  Their struggle for survival is real...

A teeny tiny succulent...

A vast amount of nothingness, full of life.  The little town to the right is Beaufort West...

And yet everywhere you look, there are different plants, struggling to survive the harsh conditions of the Karoo...

A tiny thorny succulent...

I could hold all three of these plants below in the palm of my hand...

No leaves, but plenty of pretty flowers to attract bees.  These flowers are commonly called Karoo Gold...

Their tiny leaves help prevent the plant from drying out and their little thorns help stop animals eating them...

OK, last plant pic, I promise.  Just look at these stunning colours...

The kids had a ball and our guide was really informative...

After our hike, we explored the Karoo National Park's fossil trail.  It's apparently tortoise breeding season and they were all about...

Just to show you how big they actually are, here's Jake touching one...

A river once ran through the Karoo and the region is well known for it's fossil finds.  The park has it's own Fossil Trail...

It was very cool for the kids to get up close to real fossils, including real dinosaur fossils...

 This one is a Bradysaurus...

 A fossilized tree...

 A toothy grin...

It was pretty special, I must say.  These remains are real and ancient.  Jake loved dinosaurs when he was younger (oh the number of library books we rented on these fascinating creatures)...

And a highlight was dino poo...

There are a lot of ostriches in the Karoo.  It's spring, so breeding season.  This is a female, but the males were all decked out with their red socks, necks and beaks...

As with Kruger, the Vervet Monkeys are total pests at the picnic sites.  Ever the opportunists and quite aggro about getting to the food...

The next morning, we took a walk through some of the dusty Karroo - it was quiet, but pretty and we saw plenty of evidence of animals.  It's hard to believe much can exist here, but the Karoo National Park even has lions...

 It's the end of the dry season in the Karoo, well, supposed to be.  They are also having a severe drought there...

 Ruins of an old kraal...

 It's hard to believe that anyone would want to live in this hostile environment...

This handsome guy is growing up so nicely.  He's found a new sense of confidence and has developed a great sense of humour.  He's starting to take life less seriously and working harder on his school work.  It's wonderful to see him taking ownership for his achievements.  We had a good time in the Karoo together...

Heading back to our camp...

A beautiful red hartebeest...

A baboon taking in the view...

A bontebok - I'd never seen these guys before.  They are beautiful...

The park also has a few picnic sites, with ablutions and braai facilities...

Being out of the car and walking through the bush gives you the opportunity to see the smaller treasures of the bush, like these ants dragging a moth into their nest...

We had hoped that the birds would be more abundant and we didn't see as many as we'd hoped.  Here's a little robin on the fence at the picnic site - waiting for a crumb or two...

And this is apparently a fiscal flycatcher...

We did a few game drives around the park.  The mountains are unbelievable and one can only imagine what fossilized treasures they hide...

A dry river bed...

A Verreaux's Black Eagle soaring up high in search of a snack.  We were very lucky to see 2 of these guys...

The Cape Mountain Zebra...

They are different to the ones that we see in Kruger.  They're darker, but also browner and they can climb...

A rock monitor enjoying the sunshine...

More beautiful bontebokke...

Part of the house where we stayed.  This was the main house, with the kitchen and braai area.  We slept in dormitories in bunk beds.  Fortunately, Jake and I had our own room - they were tiny...

And I'll end off with a pair of beautiful European Bee Eaters...

As always, Jake and I loved the adventure and the trip was beautiful.  I've wanted to visit the Karoo National Park for a long time and so it was good to finally get there.  We learned a lot and met some amazing people.  Camps always seem to cement friendships.  The drive from home takes about 5 hours (at granny pace), longer if you make stops for food and bathroom breaks.  Jake and I would both love to go again - the Karoo is such a stunning place and just so different.  For example, we saw these unbelievable people, known to the locals as karretjie mense (cart people).  They are direct descendants from the original San people and are migrants, moving from farm to farm to assist with sheep shearing and spring cleaning.  They literally live out of their wagons, which carries all their possessions during the day.  By night, the cart is turned upside down and everybody crawls inside to sleep. They own a donkey or two (wealthier families own horses instead) and so their cart is their mode of transport as well as their home/cupboard.  With the modernization of sheep shearing, the farmers in the region have taught the karretjie mense how to use the machines in order to keep this traditional culture going.  It's really so fascinating and truly amazing!  We saw them all huddled around their fire early one morning and were super tempted to go join them and to meet these incredible people.

Anyway, if you find yourself with a long weekend to spare and don't mind a drive, I'd highly recommend a trip to the Karoo National Park.  Go and experience life in the slow lane.

Much love,

Sue