Not a lot to say...

It seems that I am not the only blogger who's been neglecting my blogging. To say that life has been crazy, would be an understatement! But nothing I've done has seemed worth blogging about. Work has been SO busy and I just have not been able to even think about blogging. Socially, thank goodness, this week is a bit quieter then the last 2 and I'm realising just how exhausted I actually am. The past weekend was another rushed one - Friday night was movies at a friends house, Saturday morning we went through to the waterfront to catch up with an old school friend (Jacki Little) and her family. They were out here on holiday from the UK and it was lovely to see her again. Her little girl, Emma who's 20 months old, is just too cute for words. We spent time walking around the V & A and the weather was gorgeous. Had a quick bite to eat at Ferrymans, before rushing home to attend a yoga class. I haven't done yoga since the end of last year and I can't believe how much I missed it. My body felt incredible afterwards and I really need to find a new class to join. Had an engagement party on Saturday night; Sunday School with Jake on Sunday morning, followed by San Marco's ice-creams on the beachfront in Sea Point. And, yes, I did have honey hazelnut and yes, it was more than delicious! Had a kids party in the afternoon. Last night I hardly slept a wink and I had to be at the Vineyard Hotel in Newlands for breakfast by 7:30 this morning, which meant leaving home at 6:30 to try avoid the traffic, which was horrendous anyway. I was disgustingly late for work though, which was a real bonus.

Besides all of that, life's pretty boring. I don't have a thing planned for this weekend and my folks are away next weekend, so I'll have Jake all to myself. I'm planning on taking Jake out for a day of spoiling next Saturday and I can't wait. I was thinking of going to the aquarium and a movie, with a meal in between. I love having one-on-one time with him and he loves getting out and about with me too. He's really just so sweet at the moment. Yes, in true mommy style, I do think my kid's the cutest thing alive (even though he's really a naughty little so-and-so). He's just so funny at the moment, comes out with the cutest things, I spend my life laughing with him. He's also loves singing and keeps teaching me new songs he's learnt at school.

Anyway, enough whaffling from me for now! Hope everyone's well!

Lots of love xxx

It's raining, it's pouring

Hello from a miserable, gloomy Cape Town!

It was party weekend for me this weekend. And after much begging and pleading for sunshine on Saturday, for my picnic lunch at Buitenverwachting, I ended up getting weather that bordered on torrential floods and we were forced to have our picnic indoors. Seriously, the weather was bad! It actually hasn't stopped raining much since Saturday morning. My luck. But, despite the weather, I had a wonderful day and it was so special having so many good friends there with me to celebrate it. And the stormy weather outside actually made it quite cosy indoors. Instead of doing a picnic, we opted for soup starters followed by a buffet of all the picnic food, then fresh fruit, koeksisters and yummy pecan nut chocolate fudge cake from Melissas - need I say more? It was delicious. Along with all the good food we shared, there was plenty of wine and champagne flowing all afternoon and I eventually got home around 6pm. On Saturday night, we partied it up at Hemisphere and I have been suffering with a sore throat ever since. And, despite the first snow falls on the surrounding mountains, I actually spent quite a bit of time lying on the bathroom floor during the night last night, battling to get a fever down - my poor old body is already taking storm. And yes, I am at work today.

Thanks to everyone who has made turning 30 a really special occassion for me. I am really looking forward to this decade of my life and all that it holds for me. I've completely embraced the fact that I'm no longer in my 20s and I even quite like the idea of being 30!

Below are some photos of Saturday's party: -

The Beautiful Weather...

Paul, Jo, me, Sam & Steven...

Me with Wesley & Lizelle - my special friends from Augrabies...

Me with Sandi - another special friend, who flew out from the UK for my birthday...

Tammy, Jake, Gareth, Rose & Jo...

Party, party, more party...

The gift...

Singing 'Happy Birthday' to himself with his cousins, Abi and Becky...

The look that says it all...

Lights out...

It's been a week full of parties and festivities at home. It just doesn't seem to end! I was hoping to finish work a bit early yesterday, but seems like everyone else at work forgot and I was left here on my own till 4pm - I was not amused. I always find the build up to Jake's birthday quite an emotional time. Anyway, as you can see from the photos, I forgot to buy wrapping paper for his present (not that he noticed) and he loved his car! The family all came for dinner at about 6 and by 7:30, Jake was completely overwhelmed and overtired from all the attention and spoiling (possibly sugar over-load too?) all he could do was cry. I put him to bed and he was lights out in 5 minutes flat. He wasn't that keen on singing happy birthday to me this morning - guess he just wishes it was still his special day! A huge thank you to everyone for all the phone calls, e-mails and sms's - we've both been so spoilt!

Lots of love, Susie xxx

Where are the eyes in the back of your head, MA?

Especially for his birthday, Jake got hold of a pair of scissors and hacked 3 holes in his hair on Monday evening. My mom had just finished cutting his hair and we were relaxing in the lounge with a glass of wine. He honestly disppeared for 2 minutes and when I went to look for him, he was standing infront of the mirror, scissors in hand, smiling at me. Needless to say, he got his hair shaved down to a number 3, to try hide the bald patches, but they're still visible. This photo was taken before his second hair cut...

Happy 3rd Birthday, JAKE!

Today's a beautiful day in Cape Town and we're celebrating Jake's 3rd Birthday. I can't believe how much time has passed since the day he was born. And I always find that I can't help myself remembering and re-living every second of the day he arrived. I guess it's hard not to reflect on all that's happened since his arrival into this world.

I was due on 9 May, so he was a full week late. I'd had the easiest and least complicated pregnancy ever and I'd enjoyed every moment of it. Jacques and I went out for pizzas the night before Jake was born and I had a glass of wine with my meal - actually, I got shouted at by another customer for being an irresponsible parent... Anyway, we came home and snuggled into bed and I'd just managed to get comfortable and fall asleep, when my waters broke. We rushed off to hospital (00:30) and I was told that my labour hadn't even started yet. By 08:00, when my doctor came in to see me, I was only 1cm dialated. I realised at that point that not taking advantage of medical technology was going to be silly, so I told her then that I'd like an epidural. Not realising then that, because it was a Sunday, it would take the anesthetist until 11:00 to get there. By that stage, I was 4cm dialated. The anesthetic worked for a little while and I managed to snooze for a bit. Jacques ran home and had a shower and bought the newspaper. Before he'd managed to get back to the hospital, the anesthetic had worn off and the anesthetist had to come back to top me up. The second round of drugs also only worked for a short time and by about 17:00, I could feel EVERYTHING. The midwife had a quick check and called my doctor immediately. Jake was born 40 minutes later, at 17:40. We were thrilled to finally have our little boy in in our ams and I was just too chuffed that I'd actually managed to get him into this world, virtually on my own! Jacques was fantastic and the doctor said she'd never seen a dad push as hard as he did - he really did help a lot and he was completely overwhelmed by the whole experience, as I'm sure most men are. I think it must be quite hectic to watch someone you love go through such an ordeal and literally have to stand next to them, without being able to do anything to help. At one point, when I was well into pushing, Jacques burst into tears and I had to take a breather to try consol him and to let him know that I really was OK...

And here we are today. In some ways I can't imagine life without Jake, he's just such a special little boy. In other ways though, our time as a family was so short, that my time without Jake was really my time with Jacques. I don't think that Jake will ever realise exactly how much he's given me in 3 short years.

Having a child in the house (a very active one at that), life is never boring. He's always up to some kind of mischief, but he's such a sweetie, life would be so dull if he wasn't around. This morning he was up at 6:30 and we climbed into bed with my mom for a few minutes, before getting up to start preparing food for tonight. He's a real help in the kitchen and loves baking. I can't wait to get home from work to be able to give him his presents. Fingers crossed that I do manage to pull it off and go home at lunch time. I don't think he quite understands the difference between a birthday and a party yet - he keeps asking me where all his Spider-man stuff his is. When I told him that he had his party on Saturday, he said "I have poo-bear party today"?

Lastly, on the birthday front, thanks to everyone for all their gifts and messages. I'm sure Jake will have a very special day today!

Party Pictures...

Where did the weekend go?

Well, I've spent the last hour reading through everyone's blogs and catching up on all your news. Life definitely seems to be pretty busy for most of us at the moment. Unfortunately...

As most of you know, I had Jake's 3rd birthday party on Saturday morning. The weather was stunning and I don't think we could've asked for better. The jumping castle arrived the night before (much to Jake's delight) and we spent hours (well, he did - I only lasted a minute or two. Don't know how the kids manage to do it for so long!!) hopping around like lunatics before eventually heading off to bed. We were up at 7am on Saturday morning, to finish off the last of the baking, cleaning and setting up. Jake was really so excited about his birthday party this year and it was so much fun watching him enjoy it all with his friends. Because I don't normally fetch and carry him to and from school, I don't know any of the other moms or kids and it was really great seeing how Jake interacts with them. When his friends started arriving, he didn't know who to play with and he just ran from one to the other! There's definitely no doubt in my mind that he's a real little boy now, either. I must be honest, I always imagined that because he doesn't have a dad, he'd grow up a bit gentler then most boys, but he's proving me wrong and he's very much a little toughie. Actually, at the moment (much to my disgust), he seems like a bit of a bully. At one point the kids were all jumping around and a fist fight broke out. Jake and another little boy had to be separated. There were no tears and once it was all over, they were best pals again - it was hysterical! Testosterone!

After the party, we did a quick clean up and then headed off to the in-laws for a braai and to watch the rugby (yes, I was exhausted, but still managed!). Got home with my over-tired son just after 9. Rosanne very kindly looked after Jake for me on Sunday morning, letting me lie in for an extra hour (a luxury that just never happens for me anymore!). Jake & her woke me up with an egg & tomato sandwich and a cup of coffee in bed. We all piled into bed with my folks and lazed together over breakfast - it was great. Had a bit of shopping to do and then went to visit my mother-in-law. Jo came around for lunch, so managed to get home relatively early. By about 3pm, I was so exhausted and all I wanted to do was lie on the couch with Jake and watch TV. So, we hired Free Willy and that's exactly what we did. I got a beautiful candle holder that Jake made for me at school and two gorgeous cards. The one says "WHY GOD GAVE ME YOU: You sing me to sleep, you give me hugs, you keep me safe from crawly bugs; you take me places - exciting and new - what in the world would I be without you? HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY". Very cute. I hope that all mommies and grannies were showered with love yesterday!

The rest of this week isn't going to be any quieter and I'm already exhausted - how will I cope?? Jake's actual birthday is on Wednesday and mine's Thursday, so we've got the whole family coming around on Wednesday for supper. Thursday night, I'm hoping to get some friends together to go out for drinks (anyone keen to join - let me know). And then Saturday's my party. I'm going to be finished by Sunday. I've got a very good friend flying out from England especially for my birthday - she gets here on Friday and leaves again on Tuesday, so I'm going to spend quite a bit of time with her too. It's going to be busy...

Besides that, Jake's started going to school an extra day each week now, so he's there Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays. He actually asked if he could go more! Just wait until they start giving him homework!!

Anyway, I must go. I'm sorry if this sounds very disjointed - I'm too exhausted to re-read it all to see if it makes any sense...

lots of love xxx

I'm still here...

Hello!

Well, a busy day ahead of me tomorrow. And a busy evening tonight. I've got a gazillion things to do and I just hope that I haven't forgotten anything. I must fetch Jake's cake (Spider-man's head and torso), I must put the names on the party boxes, I must ice about 120 minature cupcakes - and no, they won't be half as exciting as the ones at Caroline's party. Mine, keeping in with the Spider-man theme, are in red paper cups and will be iced blue, with cherries on top. The jumping castle arrives tonight between 6 and 7 and I'll have to try figure out how to put it up before tomorrow morning (can't be that difficult can it?). I need to sort out where to put the kids when they're stuffing their smiley little faces on the junk food I've bought for them (I mean, set a table for them) and then I need to sort out where to put all the adults. Hopefully each parent will take care of their own off-spring tomorrow and I'll be able to concentrate on making sure there's tea and coffee. Jake is soooo excited and I can't wait to give him his Ferarri, although he's going to have to wait until Wednesday to get it.

Hope you have a good weekend!!
Love Sue xxx

Shantaram

Shantaram, meaning man of peace, or man of God's peace, is the name of the book I'm reading at the moment. It's an autobiography written by Gregory David Roberts and the blurb on the back of the book reads as follows:

"In the early 80s, Gregory David Roberts, an armed robber and heroin addict, escaped from an Australian prison to India, where he lived in a Bombay slum. There, he established a free health clinic and also joined the mafia, working as a money launderer, forger and street soldier. He found time to learn Hindi and Marathi, fall in love, and spend time being worked over in an Indian jail. Then in case anyone thought he was slacking, he acted in Bollywood and fought with the Mujahedeen in Afghanistan...Amazingly, Roberts wrote Shantaram three times after prison guards trashed the first two versions. It's a profound tribute to his willpower...At once a high-kicking, eye-gouging adventure, a love saga and a savage yet tenderly lyrical fugitive vision"

I'm only about half way through the 933 pages of Shantaram , but I can't put it down. I have friends who have travelled in India and this book is so descriptive, I almost feel as though I've been there too. Two of my favourite passages from the book are:

“I couldn’t respond. My culture had taught me all the wrong things well. So I lay completely still, and gave no reaction at all. But the soul has no culture. The soul had no nations. The soul has no colour or accent or way of life. The soul is forever. The soul is one. And when the heart has its moment of truth and sorrow, the soul can’t be stilled.

I clenched my teeth against the stars. I closed my eyes. I surrendered to sleep. One of the reasons why we crave love, and seek it so desperately, is that love is the only cure for lonliness, and shame, and sorrow. But some feelings sink so deep into the heart that only lonliness can help you find them again. Some truthes about yourself are so painful that only shame can help you live with them. And some things are just so sad that only your soul can do the crying for you.”

“Sometimes we love with nothing more than hope. Sometimes we cry with everything except tears. In the end that’s all there is: love and its duty, sorrow and its truth. In the end that’s all we have – to hold on tight until the dawn.”

Anyway, just thought I'd share it with you - I highly recommend this book to anyone who's looking for something a bit serious to read...

I did it!

Yay - I've finally figured out how to put in paragraphs!!!! I'm soooooo clever! xxx

Before I was a mom

I've just received this poem from a friend. Although I've seen it before, with mother's day around the corner, I thought I'd share it. I hope I get it to publish in paragraphs (don't know how to make line breaks - if you hadn't noticed), if not, use your imagination a little. Anyway, this poem is so beautiful and it's words are so true. Sometimes, being a mom is really tough, but at the same time, it's the most rewarding job in the world. I wouldn't change it for anything!! I love being somebody's mom. And having one too. So, to all the beautiful moms, grannies and moms to be...

Before I was a Mom -
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom -
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put them down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom -
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between en a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom -
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom.

OK, OK...

Been getting into some trouble for not having updated my blog in a while. Sorry to all my avid blog readers... Life has been unusually busy lately and it's not going to quieten down for a while. Work has been insanely busy and besides my blog, I've neglected so many friends with e-mail too. Anyway, hopefully today I can get myself back on track and make everyone like me again! So, it's Jake's 3rd birthday on the 16th and my 30th on the 17th. Jake's having a party this Saturday and I'm having one next Saturday. Jake's party was supposed to just be a small one with a couple of his friends because I'd decided to have it at home this year. Needless to say, it still ended up on 18 kids. And then I was told by his teacher that they usually invite the whole class to their birthday parties, which meant that I had another 8 kids to invite. Fortunately, there are a few that can't make it, but we're still on 21 kids. When you add on the fact that each kid brings at least one adult, plus the fact that all Jake's grandparents and aunts & uncles also want to be there - you end up with a crowd of about 35 - 40 adults along with the 21 kids. So, this week has consisted mainly of shopping, baking and preparing party packs. I've hired a jumping castle and I'm just crossing everything I own in the hope that the weather's better then it is today. Anything, except rain... So, after Jake's party, we've hopefully got a quiet weekend ahead. Wednesday's his actual birthday and I'm hoping to get half the day off work. The family will all pop in for cake and coffee - fortunately, to celebrate both our birthdays in one go. Thursday's my birthday and I'll probably go out for drinks with friends - hopefully, I'll be able to control the amount of alcohol consumed. Friday's a rest. Saturday I'm having a picnic lunch for my birthday at Buitenverwachting (the farm Jacques was a winemaker on and where we lived) with a small group of close family and friends. I was very undecided about what to do for my birthday. Jacques and I would both have been turning 30 this year (his birthday was in November) and we'd always said we'd have a big garden party on the farm, with fairy lights in trees and caterers, etc. Anyway, I didn't even consider having my party on the farm, because I just thought it'd be too difficult to face. But, I was there for a picnic lunch in Feb with my family and decided that I would have my birthday there, despite my fears. To be honest, the group that I've invited are all people who will understand exactly how I will be feeling and will know how tough it is to be there without Jacques. Anyway, I am looking forward to it and it's going to be tons of fun having all the kids there too. Jake absolutely loves the farm and he's going to be in his element showing all his friends around. And, all I've had to do for it so far is order the cake (pecan nut chocolate fudge from Melissa's - mmmmmmmm). I'll buy wine there and they have a lady who runs the picnic site and who makes up all the picnics there, so she'll be doing all the catering. I'm also quite sure that there's a couple of friends who'll want to go out afterwards, so it might be a late night... I bought Jake's birthday present last night and I'm so excited about it! It's a remote control red Ferrari - he's going to love it. Every time he sees any kind of sports car, he tells me it's a Ferrari. I tried it out last night and it's super fast! Hope you enjoyed reading about not a lot. I promise to try update more often!! Lots of love to you all xxx