The boys...

These boys.  Oh how my heart misses them and how I long for them to be together.  My 3 little amigos...

Jake had some exciting news this week - the boys are missing him as much as he's missing them and when Michael was told that he could bring a friend to Cameron's birthday party tomorrow morning, he wanted Jake to join them.  So, tomorrow is a fairly big day for us and Jake is literally bouncing off the walls.  It was the first thing he told me this morning - "I'm seeing Michael & Cameron tomorrow!!".  Besides bumping into them quickly at Canal Walk once, they haven't seen each other since last December!  Considering that Jake thought of them as his brothers, that's a long time!  

Like proper brothers, these three used to fight like cats and dogs and I guess they all had their issues over one thing or another, but at the end of the day, they were like family for 2 1/2 years.  That's a long time in a child's life.  For Jake, coming from a home where he is an only child, it was fantastic for him to experience life with "siblings".  At least every other weekend.  We hated the weekends that Michael and Cameron were with their mom and used to look forward to the next one when the kids would be back with us again.

Even though our break up wasn't my decision, I've felt really guilty for the hurt that's been caused to them through it.  They were the innocent victims in a grown up mess.  The worst part is that we weren't able to say goodbye and we've done our best to pick up the pieces of our lives and move forward.  There's really no other way to go.  We've had limited contact with the boys via Instagram, but it's not the same.  Things change for them tomorrow and I hope that their friendship can grow again.  It will be different and I don't want anything to do with their father (he won't be at the party tomorrow), so time spent together will be through the boy's mom, but hopefully this is a small stepping stone.

I am so nervous about tomorrow too.  I feel like our hearts are starting to heal again and I am scared that this is going to open up old wounds for us, but we wouldn't miss it for the world and it's also nice to know that the boys are missing Jake a lot too.  Fingers crossed that all the therapy Jake's been through this year will stand him in good stead tomorrow.  And hopefully I don't just sit and cry!

Love,

Sue XXX