Oh sweet child of mine...

The times are changing.  My child is growing up quite literally before my eyes and it's terrifying and exciting all at the same time.  He's HUUUUUUUUGE and has grown even more since the photo above was taken!!  It's not a great photo of me, but I really like it of Jake.  He can rest his chin on the top of my head now - I am feeling very short!  

It's fun stage of life for him and I am enjoying him so much.  That said, I don't think there's any stage that I haven't enjoyed with him.  Perhaps it's knowing that I only have one shot to enjoy being someone's mom, that's made me treasure every step of the journey.  

Jake seems to finally have caught up to his friends in the eating department and seems to be permanently hungry at the moment.  He's forever grazing.  Despite that, he's is still skinny, so I'm always happy to see him stuffing his face.  He's a bit fussy in the food department though, which I worked hard to avoid when he was little.  It's a pain, especially at supper time.  He doesn't like veggies (not even fries!) and so that always makes supper a bit challenging.  He tries though, so maybe it'll change soon...

Jake adores his little cousins and loves it when they come to visit.  He spends the most time with Rylee, who is 10 years younger than Jake.  Schools out now until mid-Jan, so hopefully he'll be seeing a lot more of all his cousins.  X-box is still a huge feature in Jake's life, but the Fortnite craze seems to have faded a lot.  He's moved onto more technical games and spends too much time playing Call of Duty Black Ops 4 at the moment.  I must be honest, during the holidays I don't mind him gaming too much, especially when I'm at work, but during the term, we have some fairly strict rules around the X-box.

 Jake's reached an age where he really things his cousins are cute.  He admitted the other day that he is looking forward to having kids of his own one day - yay it looks like my chances of being a granny one day are fairly high!!!  No pressure!  Bi is still our little princess and she has us all wrapped around her finger.  She is a proper act and loves having a stage.  She squeals and giggles like a little girl should.  She wears the most beautiful dresses and pretty shoes, but invariably forgets to sit like a lady.  She is our little rose amongst all the boys...

Academically, Jake has done well this term.  He's changed his study style and is trying new ways to learn better.  I think he was a little disappointed with some of his year end marks, but he is doing well and as long as he learns from his little slip-ups this year, then that's the most important thing, really.  So, Jake's finished grade 9 this year and will be moving on to grade 10 in 2020.  Grade 9 is a notoriously tough year (as are grades 7 & 11).  He's dropping subjects to focus on what interests him most.  Next year, he'll be taking English 1st language, Afrikaans 2nd language, life orientation, pure maths, science, biology (now called life sciences) and accounting.  A tough set of subjects, but he is thrilled to have dropped social sciences (aka history & geography).  Fingers crossed next year is a bit of a breather before grade 11 hits us.  I can't believe we only have 3 more years left of school.

This year, Jake's gone from wanting to be a wildlife vet to a Chartered Accountant.  I'm not sure that either profession suits him, but I'm sure he'll still change his mind a few more times before he has to settle on something. 

 

 Jake still does Junior Rangers, this was his third year with the program.  He mutters and moans when I wake him up early to go (usually to the Cape Point Nature Reserve), but he always enjoys the outings and learns so much.  I've been able to join the group for walks and info sessions, mostly because I have to travel so far to get there and I've thoroughly enjoyed learning with the group.  We had a really lovely visit to the penguins at Boulders a few weeks back...

We had so much fun with the rugby world cup this year too.  Jake played rugby in primary school, but has switched to hockey since he started high school last year.  He absolutely loves hockey, so hopefully it's a sport that he keeps up.  To be honest, he'll never be on the first team, but he has fun and loves being part of a team.  They had an awful season and the score never seems to worry him, he always has fun and that's what's most important to me.  That said, the rugby world cup was a highlight for us this year and the Springboks did us so proud.  This was us joining in for the national anthem ahead of the final...

So, in a very short little nutshell, that's what Jake's been up to.  His social life is booming and now that it's holidays (6 weeks, whoo-hoo!!) I'm sure he'll be spending lots of time (and money) with his friends.  They're such a great group of kids, he's really lucky to have the friends he's got.  The girls are definitely becoming more of an interest these days too and I love that he shares this with me.  He is actually a very open teen and talks about any and everything with me.  He can make me blush, but it doesn't help to be a prude.  There are plenty of things he's had to ask me, where his father would've been a better equipped to answer, but that's life.  He's in serious need of a shave, that top lip is getting very dark, but he's quite happy to ignore that for as long as possible - the razor and cream are all in his draw for when he's ready.  His skin has been a bit of an issue for him, so I think he's worried that shaving will cause some sort of a flare up.  He will have to tackle this before school starts again!

In other news, Rylee invited us to attend his Christmas concert at school.  He didn't know it at the time, but he chose the same costume (kangaroo) that Jake wore when he was at the same school in 2009.  I had such a huge lump in my throat and a tear in my eye the whole way through the play - he looked so like Jake and it was so hard to process how quickly the time has passed.  Jake is so grown up already, I'm not sure how we went from a little boy to a hairy teen so quickly!!  Below is Rylee...

 Jake...

   Rylee...

 Jake...

 When the time came for Rylee to do his bit in the play (If I were a butterfly), he initially got a bit of a fright when he saw just how many people were watching him...

 Then waved at his mom...

 And then started to look a little nervous when it came time for his turn...

 And just when we thought he wasn't going to jump, he sprang into action and our little kangaroo bounced up and down.  This boy has only got eyes for his mom!  Sadly, his dad had to work and missed the whole show.  That broke my heart so much...

 Oh and one last time - there's Jake jumping too.  Now scroll back up and look how big they get in 10 years...

 The concert was really short, just 30 minutes long and the kids were brilliant.  They ended off singing we are the champions, complete with a blonde haired Freddy Mercury (in front of the mike) and our very own little Siya Kolisi, holding up the trophy.  The crowd obviously went nuts and the kids felt very proud of themselves.  So sweet...

If you want to go back and look at the post of Jake's concert, you can click here.  It makes my eyes leak.

Other than that, life has been very busy.  It always feels like we need a breather after exams are done.  The exam cycle was nearly 3 1/2 weeks long this year and it's tiring for everyone.  The weather has improved so much and the kids spent the whole day in the pool yesterday.  Corky and Stinky slept over last night and Rylee's been there most of the time too.

Work's been insanely busy.  I didn't think I'd ever find myself rushed off my feet in my job, but I am.  I love it and I would never complain - they might make me work a full day then and I still like being able to leave at 3pm.  They do get a full day's work out of me though, so every one's happy.

We've had lots of birthdays too - Jacques mom turned 70 in October and it's been both his dad and my dad's birthdays in November!  Speaking of my dad, he's doing very well.  Thanks to my mom and all her tireless help, he's still got both his legs.  It's been a tough year for them and he really wouldn't have managed without my mom.  She dresses his feet every 3rd day and makes sure he gets a good 1km walk in just about every day.  The doctors are amazed that he is able to walk as far as he does.  His feet are very sore though and we are just grateful for every extra day that he has them.

And on that note, Christmas is well on the way now and we are all getting ready to share another special day together..  Jo and Rosie both have elves that have moved into their homes in the build up to Christmas and it's become one of my favourites - I love seeing how naughty their elves can be!  Jo's one is having a love affair with a fairy and has brought his cousin with him from the North Pole for training.  Rosie's one has been eating the dog's biscuits and having snowball fights with Batman.  It's such a fun tradition.

Anyway, sending love.  Sorry that I've been away fro so long.

Sue XXX

Life can be so unkind...

This morning we had a funeral.  I hate funerals, but this one was unavoidable - one of Jake's good friends lost his mom to cancer last week.  It came suddenly to us, but she's been ill for a long time.  She obviously wanted to keep it quiet and so she just slowly withdrew from the side of the sports fields and her husband became more and more present.  My heart is broken for her son, who kept his mom's illness a secret from all his friends for years...

Sadly, this is the second funeral in just about as many months that Jake's had to go to.  Another of his close friends lost her mom a couple of months ago, also to cancer.  This came just 2 years after this same friend's dad died of a heart attack.  Out of thier group of 8 kids, 4 parents are dead.  That's scary.

My heart is so heavy for these children who have had to grow up so suddenly and so harshly.  I can't help but ask why?  I know how awful it is to get over losing someone you love.  Can you ever get over grief?  It sucks and it physically hurts like someone's driving a knife right through your chest.  'Heartsore' is a very real thing.  My heart is hurting so badly for Jake's friend, who was so unbelievably brave this morning and his mom would've been so proud of him, if not completely heartbroken by the fact that he had to go through any of this at all.  Today I was very aware of the fact that although Jake's dad is dead and it hasn't been easy for him growing up without a dad, he was spared the grief of losing Jacques because he was so little at the time.  As sad as it makes me that he doesn't know his amazing father, he doesn't know that ache of losing someone you love.

Seeing his friends losing parents has brought it home for Jake, that none of us is immortal.  Bad things do happen to good people and life is fragile.  Jake is terrified of something happening to me and not having any parents left.  He is blessed to have amazing grandparents and my folks have been rock stars in helping me raise him into the super cool teen that he is, so it gives me peace of mind knowing he'd be taken care of if anything happened to me, but the thought of my child's heart ever hurting that much is enough to break mine.

Sending love

Sue xxx

PS.  I'm don't want a funeral or a memorial when I die.  No need to put my nearest and dearest through that trauma on top of everything!!

A little private time...

 As a little spoil, I booked Jake and I into a little private lodge, called Hoyo Hoyo, for 2 nights at the end of our holiday in Kruger this year.  Hoyo Hoyo sits within a private concession in the Greater Kruger.  Boy oh boy was it worth every penny!!  What a spoil!  I was super lucky that I'd managed to pick it up on special, or we'd never have had such a wonderful experience.

Arriving at Hoyo Hoyo, we were greeted by two massive elephants drinking at the lodge's private water hole...

 The infinity pool was way too cold for us...

 Jake wasted no time in grabbing the front row seats to just sit and be one with nature... it's amazing to have nothing except that little rope fence to separate you from these massive animals...

 And we arrived just in time for lunch!  Hoyo Hoyo did nothing but feed us from the moment we arrived.  In the morning, there was rusks with coffee/tea/hot chocolate, then a morning game drive with more rusks and hot coffee mixed with hot chocolate and Amarula liqueur.  After the morning drive, came a breakfast  feast of both cold and hot foods.  Lunch was salads and a meat or two, with freshly baked bread and a light dessert of some sort.  Then came afternoon tea, followed by a sunset drive, with snacks and sun downers out in the bush.  Back at camp there was a 3-course dinner, followed by chocolates in our room.  Oh and bottomless cool drinks, G&Ts and wine.  I rolled out of Hoyo Hoyo...

 There were so many animals that visited the waterhole while we were there...  In this pic you can see an ellie and a buff and my monkey's toes...

 There's the rest of Jake...

 A beautiful little crested barbet...

 Sun downer stop... it gets super cold on the back of an open game vehicle, especially once the sun goes down, or before it comes up in the morning.  This was a weird scull mural that someone had put together at a picnic site.  It's a kudu cross buffalo...

  Jake put in a special request with Hoyo Hoyo's kitchen staff for mealie pap and I was invited into the kitchen to learn how to make it.  What's mealie pap, or mealie meal?  It's basically a flour made from corn, that can be made into a porridge.  It can be eaten for breakfast or as a side, or a starch, like mashed potatoes.  It's often served with a relish, with meat, or sausage.  Jake had his with oxtail stew... it's super filling...

 Ahhh... me and my giant-child with an ellie...

 This is the main relaxing area at Hoyo Hoyo.  We ate most of our meals outside here and in the evenings a fire was lit to keep us all warm...

 This is what the dining set up looks like.  Each couple or family is seated together, so it's really quite private...

  Back to our room.  This is our private deck looking out into the bush.  I must be honest, we didn't have loads of time to sit and enjoy the view, we were too busy eating!!

  I had a massage in my room... Jake snapped a shot of me being spoilt, with an ellie walking past...

 You can tell we never go anywhere too fancy... Jake loved that there were gowns and slippers for us...

 View of the bed and dressing room area.  I must be honest, the orange didn't worry me when I was there, but it's very orange looking at the photos...

 The entrance to our hut with the wild outdoors just outside our door.  We woke up to hyena tracks outside our room every morning and on our second night, I woke up at about 2am with the monkeys and baboons going mad.  We'd been told that would happen if there was a leopard nearby, but I couldn't see him anywhere.  From then on though, I heard a lion roaring from faaaaar away and by 5:00 when we woke up, it sounded like he was right on our stoep. We left early for our morning drive that morning, in the hopes of finding him, but weren't lucky...

 The outdoor shower was AMAZING!  Definitely not for using early in the morning or late at night (too cold), but just a stunning experience...

 And there's our little housie from the deck...

 At night, the mosquito net is pulled closed around the HUGE bed and the beds were turned down.  We got beautiful bookmarks on our pillows each night too...

 We were safe to walk between our room and the dining area during the day, but not at night.  We had to be escorted back to our rooms at night...

 On our first morning game drive, we were spoilt with a sighting of a young lion.  The difference between self-driving in Kruger and staying at a private lodge is that the private lodges don't have to stick to the roads.  We literally rode through the bush to follow the lion until we couldn't any more...

 He was on a mission and looked very hungry...

  Thirsty baboons take advantage of lunch time and sneak into the lodge to drink from the cool pool.  They don't visit when there aren't guests around as the staff hit them with catties.  Baboons in Kruger are so much more pleasant than those in Cape Town.  Kruger baboons don't steal the food from out your mouth...

 Sunset in Kruger is unlike any anywhere else in the world...

 This is Jake's unedited (because it would get ruined) photo of sunset...  told you - amazing...

 Kruger was quieter for us this year and we didn't even see much at Hoyo Hoyo, but we still had some amazing sightings, like these 5 lions (the 5th one was just in the bushes to the right)  just strolling up the road towards us... 

Jake had prime position, which made me break out in a cold sweat...

 So close, I was terrified.  Our ranger didn't have a gun and the car is completely open, as you can see.  You have no idea of how cold your blood runs, when you see a lion that close to your child...

 Jake took some amazing shots of these lions.  I was too terrified that he was going to get eaten!

 One down, 4 to go...

 I've never heard Jake so quiet!

  So, that's what I saw.  These are Jake's awesome photos of the lions walking past him...

 This one gives me the chills... she was looking straight at him and she was so close that he probably could've touched her if he'd stuck his arm out the "window"...

 The young male.  He had a sore paw and was red with blood around his neck.  We suspect that he was chased off a kill and maybe had something to do with all the roaring I'd heard earlier that morning.  We think that the roarer was a bigger male, so this young guy would've stood no chance...

 So close.  I can't even tell you if he was smelly, I think I was holding my breath and just hoping that Jake was doing the same...

 And then they were gone.  The girls disappeared into the bushes quickly and the male walked along the road in the veld a little way before he disappeared too...

 After the lion sighting, we stopped for our morning hot choc/coffee/Amarula in the bush. everyone was on a high and we were all terrified of actually getting out of the car...

 Hey, Jake...

 I love you so much...

 And you're super cute and the girls are going to be in trouble in no time at all...

 After Hoyo Hoyo, we had one last night in Kruger.  I had though it would be a good idea, but I was actually ready to come home straight from Hoyo Hoyo.  I felt emotional and home sick, which I've never had before.  We stayed at Skukuza, which is closer to the airport.  Impala making their way down for a drink...

 A lone giraffe bull checking out the view...

 And a beautiful ellie too...

 And oh, one last lion sighting... this time 4 young males...

 Yawn... it's a tough life being king of the bush...

 And another one...

 Another one making eye contact... chills, I tell you...

 Our last sunset over the Sabie River from Skukuza camp.  We had burgers for dinner at the Cattle Baron in the camp...

 Jake wanted to do one last activity in the bush before we headed home, so we decided to do a guided morning walk.  It sounded like a good plan, but we nearly missed our flight because of it.  This is one of the rangers standing in a rhino midden (toilet), explaining how they re-visit the same spots to do their business and how they distribute their scent from there...

 A tree that started from a seed that fell into a crack in a rock.  This tree will eventually crush the rock...

 Jake at our little snack stop (provitas, cheese, biltong, dried fruit, nuts and juice)...

Sadly, our morning walk didn't end off on a high for us.  We'd spotted a lot of vultures when we were having our snacks, so the guides had to go investigate.  I was terrified that we'd walk into a pride of lions, but what we found was far, far worse -  a rhino that had been killed in a poaching.  Rhino conservation is something very close to Jake's heart, having helped to rescue one in Kruger when he was 11.  Finding a poached animal really spoilt the last little bit of our trip for us.  There's nothing that can describe the image of that beautiful, strong, massive animal reduced to his knees, with his horn butchered off his face.  It makes you so angry with humanity and it makes you feel so helpless.  What can we do to stop this cruelty?  Anyway... these two hyenas and about a hundred trillion vultures were feeding off the 5-day old carcass when we went to investigate.  Fortunately, in this photo, you can't see the rhino at all and we won't share the images that we have here either.  I do believe that we need to get angry about this.  On a side note, we are part of a whatsapp group for people to report their sightings in the park, rhino sightings are not shared on this group.  You cannot actually believe how many animals are photographed with snares around their heads and legs and necks.  It's brutal and our rangers are out there putting their lives at risk in the fight against poachers to protect our wild life.  I wish there was something I could, this made me feel so helpless...

Besides this devastating sighting, Jake and I had a super holiday.  We had a great time together and Hoyo Hoyo was really the cherry on top of it all.  15 days in the bush, away from everything was just what we needed and we were both ready to get back to hard work and term 3.  We are contemplating going to Kruger next September and possibly going to Croatia or Greece next year June/July.  We'll see though, the bush has us hooked...

Sending love,

Sue xxx